The Tribune – Edition 44
Sunday 8th July



DETROIT CAPO DOWN!


In a shock incident, Priesthood Capo Paola was last night, July 7th, killed by Atremo member Mr Long. Mr Long himself was shot down soon after in a revenge attack by the Detroit faction.

The details of the initial skirmish are blurred. The New York Times has reported that Priesthood Made was accused of opening fire on Mr Long over an issue with a Bar in the cities business district. However the Priesthood account differs, with Zimbabwe insisting that Mr Long opened fire randomly.

What appears certain, is that once the conflict between the two men started, Zimbabwe requested the help of Detroit Capo Paola, with tragic consequences.

The Tribune caught up with Paola’s daughter, Shayla, for her first hand account of what happened.

“My mother received a message from Zimbabwe, saying that he was being randomed by Mr. Long. We have been friends with Mr. Long’s family for some time, so she tried to investigate this incident as best she could. Having moved to Detroit, she was preparing a message for Mr. Long, but was attacked twice before this message could be sent. Thankfully she had bodyguards, and they took the initial shots. She then shot back at Mr. Long, but his whackback was strong, and killed her.”

This goes against reports in the NY Times that the death was the result of a botched kidnapping attempt. When questioned about this Shayla refuted the claims:

“The Times got it wrong. She never got shot during a kidnapping attempt. The only shot fired was the one which resulted in her death. If Mr Long had waited a few minutes we would have been able to talk to him.”

Shayla, obviously upset by her mothers death, remained jovial about the future.

“We seem to always die going to someone's aid. I doubt that will ever change!”

The Priesthood will obviously feel this loss deeply, Paola being the second highest ranked member of their organisation, behind only their leader Mr. Smoke, as well as a much respected member of the community.

The death of Mr. Long is expected to spell an end to the matter, but The Tribune will keep you up to date if the situation progresses.



ALL FOR NOTHING?


Atremo and Silentbreed leaders, Bill and Paradox, were both killed in a vicious gun battle on Thursday night, as an argument over the death of Silentbreed Gangster Cadaver spilled over into the higher ranks of the families.

The killer of Cadaver is still not known, with many suggesting he was killed for mugging in Atlanta, despite his protestations that this was not the case. A war of words erupted between Paradox and the various Atlanta factions as he attempted to find some answers, and these talks eventually led to war.

Bill, the Atremo leader, was the first to die, whilst Paradox and Atlanta Capo Lefty2Guns battled it out. With a number of bodyguards dead, and Paradox hurt, he made the controversial decision to seek refuge in LA.

He was eventually tracked down in LA by Revelation, a man with Atremo and Outsider associations. Revelation shot Paradox dead as he attempted to get safe, and was dispatched soon after by The Priminister for breaking the LA lockdown.

An undercurrent to the whole affair was the recent controversy surrounding the deaths of Dario Castelletti and Marguerite by Silentbreed Wise Guy Redd Foxx. The future of the Silentbreed family is now unknown, with nothing having been heard from Redd since the death of his boss.

The Tribune would like to send its sympathies to the families of the two men who lost their lives in this incident; it is always a shame to see situations descend so rapidly into violence.



THE WINDY CITY IS MIGHTY PRETTY


Chicago, one of the underworlds most sought after cities, appeared at the head of a controversy this morning, as bitter words were spoken about the future of the city.

Former Chicago Boss Portia, believed to be the highest ranked mobster ever to have ruled directly over Chicago, who recently made the move to Las Vegas, is understood to have given her blessing to Randle McMurphy, a close friend of the late Dario Castelletti, the man whose death sparked the controversy.

Portia, with the support of her new family, has agreed to back Mr. McMurphy’s plan for Chicago, in the belief that he will put in place the plans that she and Mr. Castelletti had worked so long on.

Their has been much criticism of this decision, with mobsters from Detroit to Miami voicing their concerns. These concerns are based around the unproven track record of McMurphy, who has only very recently entered the American underworld.

Discussions about the situation are ongoing, and whilst one individual appeared keen to drag the discussion into an argument, it is to their credit that the other participants have, for the most part, maintained their dignity whilst arguing their point.

The position of Chicago seems certain to take shape over the coming days and weeks as McMurphy sets up a small crew out of a local bar. It is understood that New Yorker Adrian Mole has also made the move to New York, and it is not yet known how these men will work together in Chicago. The future will tell all.



THE RETURN OF THE TRIBUNE!


The return to the news stands of the nations most controversial publication, The Tribune, was met with fervour by the people of America, as the much loved West Coast news paper made a return to do battle with Vegas based upstart Nuova Donna.

The rival newspapers were taking place in a $2.5 million battle for supremacy, as they went head to head. The Tribune’s return was sparked by the death of Zatoichi, the original leader of male team. This team was set to go head to head with a team of West coast females to create a one-off paper, but when Zat passed away, The Tribune became the last bastion of Male dominance.

The judging panel is still out, with The Tribune understanding that they have already consumed 650 cups of coffee and 200 pastries. Results are expected soon in this big money battle royale, and The Tribune will bring you the results soon.


***BREAKING NEWS***


Los Angeles kingpin Carlos Marcello has announced the opening of a betting line on the Battle of The Sexes competition, quoting the following odds:

Nuova Donna – 1/20
The Tribune and that tart Valentine – 200/1

The best article competition also has a line:

The Unluckiest Crab – 10/1
Chicago Boss Heads West – 50/1
The Big Sleep for Castelleti Corp. – 5/1
Mr. V’s guide to multi tasking – 100/1
The big interview – 5/1
Portia leaves Chicago – 7/1
America closes its borders – 3/1 co-fav
Takedown plot foiled – 7/1
The nation speaks - 3/1 co-fav
Valentine a man of steel – 7,000,000/1
Lily’s corner – 10/1

Betting limits may apply to these odds, please contact Carlos Marcello for details.



MR V HOSPITALISED IN VICIOUS ATTACK!


In shocking news coming out of Los Angeles, it is understood that Vegas Consig Mr Valentine was this morning seeking urgent medical attention at a Hollywood based hospital.

The injury appears to have occurred after a vicious attack by suspected “angry drunk” Sweetie. The Tribune understands that Sweetie, who was clearly inebriated at the time, smashed a wine glass over the Vegas man’s head after an altercation involving some Scampi Fries, Cherry and copious amounts of water.

The laceration suffered is believed to be deep, and while not life threatening may leave him permanently scarred.

Cherry, proprietor of Cherry Blossoms where the incident occurred, gave The Tribune a run down of what happened.

“Well I was having a drink with Sweetie, and Val came in and was just acting weird. He ate a load of Scampi Fries, and was after more, so I threw some water at him. He moved out of the way and it soaked Sweetie, so she smashed him on the noggin with her Wine Glass. I don’t know what all the fuss is about, it wasn’t that hard and he seemed alright a while after”

However on the scene eye witness S Nash was heard to give a very different account

“What do you want me to say? Oh yes, ok.

They were drunk. Very drunk. And the attack was vicious. There was blood everywhere. I thought he was going to die, it is amazing he is still here…

is that ok? Can I get the money now?”

The Tribune understands that Mr Valentine has already contacted “Glass Jaw” Jim Garrison and that his legal options are being considered. More on this as it develops.

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